I'm In a Closet and I Don't Know Why
by Shinzui-Chan
Summary: Three friends go to an anime con. What happens when they get lost and end up as characters in the book? Completely random funniness ensues! GaaraXDeidara, SasukeXNaruto and TemariXShikamaru. And one really, really OOC Kankuro!
1. Chapter 1

**I'm only saying this thingy once, so listen. The characters aren't mine (a bit obvious, if they were then the book would be about Gaara instead of Naruto) Pocky isn't mine, Fruits Basket isn't mine, maps, cons, doors, closets and Kankuro's awesome hat aren't mine either. Sad face :(

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**

_A Sasuke, a Gaara and a Sailor Mercury all walk into a bar. Lol, no, actually they walked into an anime con. This isn't some lame joke, you know. _

The three friends glanced at the map on the wall which, typical of maps, got them even more lost and confused. Rythia, the girl dressed as Sasuke, stopped and looked around as if that would do anything. "Follow me!" she said. "There must be someone somewhere who can help us!"

Konjou, the Sailor Mercury and Shinzui, the Gaara followed her down the hall, knowing it would be useless to argue. Walking down the hall, they didn't find anyone. However, they did find a door. Rythia, being the brave and slightly crazy person she is, pushed it open wide. What they saw confused them greatly.

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**Author's Note: Um, really short and boring first chapter, don't kill me! The next ones will be much better, I just had to explain how they got where they are. Rythia (aka blackfrost08, read her stories, they're better than mine!) and Konjou are also in this story because they helped me write it. Thanks guys!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" squealed Shinzui. "Kankuro! Eeeeeee! I love your hat!"

He stared. And stared. And stared some more. Finally he spoke. "Um, what do you think you're doing in my closet?"

Konjou intelligently replied "Huh? Closet? Where? I'm not in your closet."

To which the sand nin said "Get out of my closet Temari. No, you can't borrow any more shirts. You always wreck them. And get that blonde girl out too. And why on earth is Naruto here?"

The trio gaped in extreme confusion. Rythia babbled "Ablablablah?"

"Intelligent as always, Naruto" Kankuro fired back.

"Naruto? Where? OMG I'm wearing orange! Am I Naruto?" asked Rythia/Naruto.

"I think so." answered Konjou. "I have a giant fan. I'm Temari? Well, at least then I get Shikamaru."

"Shikamaru?" asked Kankuro. "You're still hanging around that lazy bum?"

"He's smarter than you!" Konjou/Temari shot back.

"Get your friends out of my closet sis!" he snapped.

"If you're Naruto, then who am I?" inquired Shinzui, turning to Rythia.

"Eeek!" shrieked Kankuro. "That's no blonde girl, there's an S-rank criminal in my room!" "Awwww but he's so cuuute! How could something that adorable hurt anyone?"

"I guess you're Deidara, then" stated Rythia.

"Well, we're somehow in Kankuro's closet, we're not at the con and I'm so confused but hey, at least I'm cute" said Shinzui.

"Where's Gaara, Temari? I want to show him what I found!" squealed Kankuro.

"Uh, dunno" Konjou said and shrugged. He led them out of the room and down the stairs to where Gaara was sitting outside.

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**Author's note: See? This one is better, right? So in case you didn't understand, Rythia turned into Naruto, Konjou turned into Temari and I turned into Deidara. Aren't I adorable? Lol, I get to blow stuff up! Read and review, or else I will blow more stuff up! I want at least one review or you don't get the next chapter!**


	3. Chapter 3

Upon hearing footsteps, Gaara jumped up and looked behind him just in time to see a screaming, squealing blonde mass flying at him. "OMGILOVEYOU!" it said.

"Uh, what?" stammered Gaara.

"I found him in my closet. Isn't he adorable? He's nowhere near as scary as they say he is. S-rank criminal my foot, he's absolutely harmless. And so cuuute!" gushed Kankuro.

Sasuke, who happened to be walking by, noticed a blonde who looked suspiciously like Naruto hugging Gaara. Enraged, he hit him on the head with the bag he was carrying.

"Oof, what?" grunted the annoyed sand ninja.

Sasuke hit him again, harder this time.

"Whaddaya want?" repeated Gaara, shaking off the person attached to him.

"You, you are coming with me" snarled Sasuke, pulling Shinzui away by the hair. "You're not Naruto!" he yelped, dropping her on the ground.

"Obviously" she told him, lifting up her hands to stick all her tongues out at him.

"Well, stop looking like him, Deidara! Where is Naruto anyway?" he said, getting angry. Looking around, he saw Rythia hiding behind Konjou, blushing. He ran over, picked her up and spun her around, hugging her tightly.

"Squee!" she cried before fainting.

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**Author's notes: Lol, poor Sasuke, so confused! Gaara's not being really OOC here, he didn't kill me but that's just because I'm soooo cute! And if I died, no more story and that wouldn't be fun. So I need to be cute, it's essential for my survival. Again, I want at least one review before I put up the next chapter. If you review, I'll blow something up, and that's always fun! BOOM!**


	4. Chapter 4

Konjou immediately took out her giant fan and fanned her until she came to. "Hey, this thing comes in handy" she observed, folding it back up.

"Hey!" shouted Gaara.

While he was watching Konjou struggle with the fan, Shinzui had snuck up behind him and unhooked his gourd. Holding it like a trophy, she ran in circles around him while everybody stared, stunned.

"Ooh, can I see?" asked Konjou, pulling the stopper out. "Holy cow, what's going on here?"

"I don't have a clue!" answered Shinzui.

"Aaaah, I want my Pocky back!" whined Gaara.

The gourd was stuffed with Pocky cookies.

"Pocky? Where? You know those are my favourites!" Rythia said.

"I thought you liked ramen, Naruto?" asked Sasuke, puzzled by this sudden change.

"Pocky, ramen, same thing, right?" she said, not noticing her words, thoroughly confusing him.

"Huh? Cookies and noodles have nothing in common" Sasuke pointed out. "Oh well, I still love you even if you're crazy, Naru."

At this, Rythia almost fainted again.

"Want to go get ramen for lunch?" asked Sasuke.

"Of course" replied Rythia. "See you later, guys!"

"Hey, is that your Pocky, Gaara? How much of that stuff do you eat?" asked Kankuro. "I think you should join that support group I heard about, "Pocky Addicts Anonymous". Let's go!"

"Noooooooo!" wailed Gaara.

~later~

"Noooooooo!" wailed Gaara.

"Will you shut up already?" grumbled Kankuro. "Look, Choji and Shikamaru are here. Hey, guys!"

"Hey, are you here for the dessert addict support group?" asked Shikamaru.

"Nope, just bringing my brother. I found his secret stash this morning" Kankuro replied.

"Yeah, I'm making sure Choji actually goes in this time."

"Why-" began Kankuro.

"Hello everybody!" screeched an ear-splitting voice.

"That's why" explained Shikamaru. "He hates Sakura. The meeting's started, I think we should get out of here."

"Good plan" agreed Kankuro.

"By the way, is Temari home? I haven't seen her in a while. I miss her."

"Yeah, but she's asleep, I think"

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**Author's Note: So, a bit of Pocky randomness. It's the best food ever! More funniness coming once I get a review! Thanks to blackfrost08 for being the only person to ever review. If I get a review from a different person, I'll do a happy dance! Yay!**


	5. Chapter 5

"Knock knock, anyone alive in there?" came a voice through the door.

"I'm alive, but I don't know about, um, Temari? She seems pretty out of it." answered Shinzui.

"She'd better be alive because I'm finally here" came Shikamaru's voice as he walked into the room with Kankuro. "Ack, I'm sitting on a book. How troublesome." he drawled, passing the book to Kankuro.

"Careful with that! It's a limited edition Fruits Basket!" Kankuro gasped, opening the book carefully and beginning to read.

"A big fan!" asked Shikamaru "Why-"

"OMG are you? I am too! I just love Yuki! He's so cool!" interrupted Kankuro.

"- is Temari holding a big fan? Doesn't she usually hold a teddy bear when she sleeps?" finished Shikamaru. After realizing what Kankuro said, he stared in confusion. Kankuro blushed.

"Oops, I thought I found a fellow fan" he mumbled.

"Hey Temari, wake up!" said Shikamaru, poking her awake.

"Aaaah I can't move!" Konjou screamed.

"Sorry, but you usually hit whoever wakes you up. I had to use Shadow Possession" he explained.

"Hey, she's awake now? Oh, hi!" said Shinzui, walking into the room.

"How bothersome. The Akatsuki are here. I'll handle it" said Shikamaru, standing up.

"No, it's cool. He's staying with us." reassured Kankuro.

"Uh, he's dangerous" warned Shikamaru.

"Look. He's so cute. How could he be dangerous? Someone must've framed him."

"Probably, he doesn't look like he'd realize anybody plotting anything against him."

"Hey, are you saying I look dumb?" cried Shinzui.

Gaara walked in, having returned from Pocky Anonymous, and just heard Shinzui's words. "You're not dumb, Sakura is dumb. Really, really dumb!"

"I agree." agreed Shinzui.

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**Author's Note: Wow, Kankuro and his Fruits Basket. For those who don't know Fruits Basket is a manga, and a girly one at that. And yay, Sakura bashing! Well, she deserves it for trying to make Gaara give up cookies. I love cookies (and Gaara!) a lot! **


	6. Chapter 6

Before anyone had a chance to agree, the door opened again. In came Sasuke and Naruto. "Hey, how was your da-ate?" singsonged Konjou.

"Grr, it was not a date! We were hungry, that's all." snapped Rythia. "But I did get you guys something for lunch!" She emptied out the bag she was carrying and a large amount of instant noodle bricks fell onto the table. "Noodles!"

"Yum! Let's eat!" exclaimed Kankuro. He switched on the kettle and while it was boiling, looked for some bowls. "Hey, who wants to be creative?" he asked.

"Ooh, me, me, me!" squealed Shinzui, jumping up and down. "Does it involve making stuff with clay?" she asked, remembering her pottery lessons. Everybody stared.

"Uh, Dei? Don't explode anything, ok? What I meant is that you're going to have to find something else to eat your soup from because there's not enough clean bowls." Kankuro explained.

"Maybe if you actually did the dishes once in a while, there would be." Gaara complained, gesturing to the gigantic dish mound in the sink.

"Rattle, rattle, rattle" came a noise from the far side of the kitchen and Shinzui emerged from the cupboard holding aloft a large, black metal teapot. "I found my bowl!" she announced.

Just then, the kettle whistled and everybody poured water into their bowls. All except for Shinzui, who was eyeing the teapot like it had sprouted wings. "How am I supposed to fit the noodles in it? Break them?" she asked, trying to jam the brick in the teapot's small opening. "Why do I always end up in these situations?"

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**Author's note: Aww, Sasuke and Rythia went on a date! ^_^ So cute! *ducks flying bowl from Rythia* Hey, a bowl! Now wash the rest of the dishes, Kankuro you lazy bum!  
As usual, reviews please! Just please be nicer than the last reviewing idiot. Feel free to answer him in the reviews! (It's your funeral, Mr. "I'm Gonna Troll Whatever I Want"! Review like that again and my evil minions will hunt you down.)**


	7. Chapter 7

-1"Hey, I know! When we're done, why don't we go train for a bit?" suggested Shikamaru. After that, everybody ate quickly and piled their dishes into the already full sink.

"Kankuro, get your lazy butt back here and do the washing. I did it the last few times!" called Gaara to Kankuro, who was already halfway out the door.

"Not unless you beat me in a match" the lazy butt in question replied. A cloud of sand rose from the ground ominously and drifted toward him.

"Better get the dish soap ready" Gaara taunted his brother.

"Ok, maybe we should get out of here. Things could fly and kill us if we stay" warned a slightly scared Konjou.

"I wonder if I can do that Wind Shruiken Rasengan thing?" wondered Rythia. "Let's go see!"

~a few minutes later~

"Aaaah! This isn't working!" screeched Rythia after a minute of staring like a psycho at the target she was supposed to hit.

"Mine is working for me. Maybe you should try harder" said Konjou, looking smug.

"Try doing something besides hitting things with a fan!" she defended. "It's hard!"

"Something like this?" asked Shinzui as she threw a clay bomb. "Boom!" she shouted as an explosion was heard.

"Wow, scary! Shinzui, you blow stuff up now? Remind me never to make you mad!" said Rythia.

"Maybe we should go learn something useful that we can use if we ever get back home" Konjou suggested. "Like some cool taijitsu techniques!"

"Eeew, but I'm not going near Lee. He's creepy looking!" answered Rythia, shivering like something icky crawled up her shirt.

"Can't we fix that? I am a part-time designer and an aspiring model!" Shinzui pointed out. "And of course I have my epically awesmazing friends with me! So what do you think? Should we do an extreme makeover?"

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**Author's note: The last part is completely, absolutely 100% true. My friends are that awesome! I seriously think someone has to give Rock Lee a makeover. Like now. He hurts my eyes a bit. Once again, reviews please!**


	8. Chapter 8

Author's note: there's a new non-canon character in this chapter because another person gets trapped in the Narutoworld. (what is this place called, anyway?)

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~later, in Temari's room~

"Scissors?"

"Check"

"Hairbrush?"

"Check"

"Tweezers and hair gel?"

"Check and check"

"Straightening iron?"

"Check"

"Now let's go raid Gaara's closet!"

Shinzui led her friends into his room like ninjas of fashion.

"So, what do we need?" she asked.

"Oooh! Short shorts! That's what I need!" said Rythia.

"Do you think we can find that in Gaara's room? I don't think so. And Rock Lee would so kick your butt if you tried" Konjou warned.

"And I really don't think any of us want an angry ninja running around" agreed Shinzui. "Maybe a black jacket?"

"No, I want to wear the shorts. I saw some cool ones in Temari's closet! Can I?" asked Rythia.

"Forget about the shorts! Wear it if you want, but concentrate! We need to make a good outfit here!" Konjou said. "I'm liking the jacket. Maybe some of these pants?"

"Awesome. Now for some accessories! Let's see…of course we need the mesh shirt, and how about a belt? A metal studded one" Shinzui said.

"Hmm, can't find any here, but Kankuro must have lots"

Konjou and Shinzui headed to Kankuro's room, where they found Rythia, wearing the shorts.

"Ahhhh! What's up with this place?" screamed Konjou. When she had opened the closet to look for the belt, a person with pink hair fell out.

Shinzui facepalmed. "Not Sakura! And why is she in the closet? Is she stalking Kankuro?" she wondered aloud. "Grrr, she must be stalking Gaara! Gaara is minez! All minez!" she growled, having a fangirl moment. _(A.N: What is it called when Deidara acts like a fangirl?) _

The pink haired girl backed up into the closet. "I don't know what's going on, but don't kill me! I'm not Sakura, I'm Cameo!" she squeaked.

"Cameo? What are you doing here?" Konjou asked. "And why are you looking like Tayuya?"

"I am?" she asked.

"Don't worry, it confused me too. By the way, I'm not Deidara. I'm Shinzui. And this," she said, gesturing at Konjou, "is Konjou, and this," gesturing to Rythia, "is Rythia."

"And don't ask me how exactly this happened. All I know is there's something weird in Kankuro's closet that brought us here. I'm just going with it because it means I get to see Shikamaru" added Konjou.

"Ok, so what's going on _besides_ us all being inside a made-up world?" asked Cameo.

"Rock Lee is being ugly. We're going to fix that!" Rythia declared. "Do you like the outfit?" she asked, turning around in circles. "It's Temari's!"

"You should go show Sasuke right now, before we do anything else" suggested Shinzui.

"What's that?" asked Cameo.

"What's what?" said Konjou.

"What's Sasuke?" Cameo asked, again.

"He's Rythia's boyfriend!" giggled Shinzui, ducking to avoid getting hit by a flying kunai. "Heehee!"

"Okay, let's go amaze Sasuke with my epic outfit!" Rythia declared.

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**Author's note: Yay, longest chapter so far! :D Lol, we're so easily distracted, though. Getting ready for a makeover, and then Rythia finds an interesting outfit so she runs off to show Sasuke. This whole story has her being a bit OOC, btw. She's the serious, leader one of the bunch! But then again, it would be weird for Naruto to be serious. And yay for Cameo! Now she's in the story too! (She hasn't read the Naruto books, so that's why her character asks so many questions)**

**Reviews, plz!**


	9. Chapter 9

~a few minutes later~

"Wheeee!" Rythia came flying down the stairs and glomped Sasuke.

"Thud" Sasuke fainted onto the couch.

"Oh no, not again. What'll you do if **I** faint?" Konjou complained, fanning the unconscious ninja with her fan. Sasuke slowly opened one eye.

"Naruto. You're wearing…short shorts? And…a tank top? And they're not even orange? They're navy blue? WTF? That's my colour! Waaaah! You stole my colour, dobe!"

"I don't care, I like them." said stubborn Rythia.

"Is that Sasuke?" asked Cameo.

"The one and only!" said Konjou. You could almost see the hearts in her eyes.

"His hair looks like a duck's butt" she said, clearly not a fan.

"Lay off the hair! Naruto loves it, right?" he asked.

"Yosh! Epic hair!" she reassured him.

"Yosh! Someone is being youthful!" shouted Rock Lee, who had smashed in through the wall.

"You're getting a youthful makeover! And remember, there's something called a door. Use it." Konjou told the surprised intruder. "Shinzui? He's here!"

Shinzui looked down the stairs "Who? Oh, him."

"A question. Why are you wearing Kankuro's hat?" asked Rythia.

"Because hats with ears are so kawaii!" she squealed. "And he said I could wear it because I make Gaara less murderous. He hasn't killed anyone yet today! I'm so proud!" Gaara peeked over her shoulder. "What's going on about me and killing? Who broke the wall? Grr, was it you, Lee?" he growled. "DIE!" Sand floated out of the container strapped to his back.

"Gaara-chan, don't kill anyone. It makes a mess that I don't feel like cleaning up" she said while hugging him, partly in a effort to restrain him. "Kankuro? A little help would be nice!" The puppet ninja wrapped chakra strings around the psychotic Gaara and towed him up the stairs.

"No one go in this room until he calms down, unless you feel like getting squashed by a whole lot of sand."

"Now that that's settled, it's makeover time! Lee, we're kidnapping you for a little while to make you look better. Believe me, people will appreciate it!"

"I'm so confused" said Cameo.

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**Author's note: Uh oh, really scary psycho Gaara! O.o And Kankuro, being the awesome person he is, let me wear one of those cool hats! Thanks, you're my bestie! (first sign of insanity, thanking fictional characters in your own story) On another note, it's finally time for the makeover! Yay!**


	10. Chapter 10

~some time later~

"Stop, Naruto! You are hurting my youthful face!" complained Lee to the tweezers-wielding Rythia.

"Sorry, but we needed to do something about that eyebrow. In the singular, not plural. It was a unibrow, for crying out loud!" Rythia told him.

"And my hair! My beautiful hair! You are ruining it!" he cried. Nobody paid his complaints any mind at all.

"Almost done" stated Shinzui, looking up from cutting his hair. "Can you grab the clothes, Konjou? They're beside the closet."

"The closet? I'm afraid someone else is going to pop out of there!" she nearly screamed. "Oh, forget it. This can't get any weirder."

"Just this last piece…" mumbled Shinzui, trimming the edges of Lee's hair.

"Aaaah!" screamed Konjou, running back into the room with Cameo in tow.

"What?" asked Rythia, looking up from tweezing Lee's eyebrows and accidentally head butting him.

"Weird creeper with sunglasses! Aaaah!" bellowed Cameo.

"Shino. He's in Kankuro's closet. I asked him who he was, and he didn't know what I was talking about. He can't be one of our friends who got sucked into this world like us. What's he doing here?" Konjou asked.

"Hey, Kankuro! Shino's sitting in your closet! Did you know that?" Shinzui called to him. He poked his head around the corner.

"Who's where?" he asked.

"Shino! He's in your closet!" Konjou answered.

"Watch out! There's a creeper in your closet! Be careful!" screamed Cameo at the same time.

"Ugh, it bugs me when he does that" grumbled Kankuro.

"Haha, bugs!" giggled Rythia, still holding Lee down and attacking his eyebrows. "Why is he in there anyways?" Kankuro blushed.

"Trust me, you don't want to know" said Gaara, having snuck up behind them. They jumped at the sudden voice.

"Tell me, tell me!" squealed Rythia, jumping up and down. Konjou rolled her eyes.

"Typical Rythia." sighed Shinzui. "Whatever you do, don't let her meet Jiraiya. Bad, bad things will happen."

"Achoo!" Everybody jumped, having forgotten about the ninja sitting in the chair.

"Almost done, just go put on the clothes and you'll be awesome" Shinzui told Lee.

"Um, what do we do about the creeper?" Konjou asked. "He has the clothes."

"Kankuro? Get the clothes out and give them to Lee! The creeper scares me!" said Konjou. Kankuro went to retrieve the clothes and handed them to Lee, showing him to a room to get changed in.

~ a few minutes later~

"OMGWOW!" squealed Cameo. "You're not ugly anymore!" As she so accurately put it, Lee was no longer ugly. In fact, he looked something like a rock star.

"Yay! We're awesome!" Rythia cheered. "We should all go out for ramen to celebrate!"

"Wake up!" Konjou yelled into the living room where Shikamaru was asleep on the couch. "We're going out for dinner!"

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**Author's Note: Wow, 10 chapters already! And I'm not planning on finishing it up anytime soon. Prepare for even more random stupidity! Yay! I just noticed that the people are starting to act more and more in-character for their Naruto forms, especially Rythia/Naruto. But not Cameo/Tayuya, because we can't have an evil person running around. She's being 100% Cameo. (but a little bit exaggerated, just for effect) The sketch of the outfit Lee is wearing will be up on my deviantArt in a little while, whenever I have the time. **

**Reviews please! Awesome people are those who review! :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**I am so, so, so, so sorry you awesome people! I haven't updated in ages! The school schedule has been kicking my butt. What do you mean I can't stay up writing until 3 in the morning? And what is this "school" you speak of? Why is it so important that I have to get up before noon? And also I now know that sewing a Gaara costume is extraordinarily difficult. Sewing it as well as a Magnus Bane costume is near impossible. Especially when you have a crazy deadline. Aaaargh! Anyways, here is chapter eleven of this never ending nonsense! Yay! And btw, for those who have been asking, the story never ends. As long as I have ideas, I will keep writing.**

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"Shika-kun, wake up. You're falling asleep in your noodle bowl again!" Konjou reminded the lazy man. "There's a noodle in your hair, by the way" she said, picking up the offending pasta and throwing it out.

"Karaoke time!" blurted Rythia, running over to the microphone. "What song do you want to hear me sing? Konjou, you're going to sing too!"

"Only if we can do The Catalyst, that new Linkin Park one" said Konjou, walking up the stairs to the stage.

"Ok!"

~a few minutes later~

After Konjou and Rythia sang Konjou stepped off the stage and Shikamaru swooped down to kiss Konjou.

"Oh wow." Konjou said, lost in the moment.

"Bleh, didn't need to see that!" Shinzui cried, making a face. Rythia looked at Sasuke.

"Yaoi time!" they announced and began doing unspeakable kissy things in the middle of the restaurant.

"I'm surrounded by overly romantic people! Save me Gaara!" screamed Shinzui, jumping in his lap. "The love! It burns!" Gaara looked at him strangely.

"Dei, since when do you hate romantic stuff? You're always telling me how much you love me and going on and on all mushy and stuff"

"I love you so much, yeah" she blurted, trying to act less strange.

"Okay, then!" said Cameo, breaking the love-induced confusion. "Are we getting dessert? The Oreo cake looks pretty yummy. I didn't even know there were Oreos here!"

"What are Oreos?" a stunned Sasuke asked.

"...These..." Cameo pointed slowly at the cookie on top of the cake. The friends had mistakenly brought Oreos into their dimension when they went through the closet portal. Sasuke stared at the cake on the menu like it was an alien from outer space.

"Can you kill someone with them?" he asked.

"No! You just eat them! They're delicious!" Cameo explained. "Don't tell me you've never seen a cookie before!"

"No, the last time I had a cookie was when Naruto decided it would be fun to bake something. They were so burnt and crunchy I took them outside and used them for shruiken practice! Now I'm suspicious of cookies" Sasuke told her. Cameo ordered the cake, all the while reassuring him that Oreos are very yummy.

"Are you sure? I still don't trust your word Tayuya, why are you even here?" Sasuke asked while glaring at Cameo.

"I'm NOT Tayuya and I DON'T KNOW why I'm here!" Cameo insisted. "I don't even know who all you people are!"

"How about we make some cookies when we get home?" asked Konjou, who was listening in on their conversation and trying not to die of laughter hearing about Sasuke's fear of cookies. "Actually, let's make it a bit of a party! A baking party, just like Shinzui and I like to have!"

"Yay! A baking party!" cheered Shinzui, who had decided that all the scary lovey stuff was done and it was safe to come out from behind Gaara. "Can we make those yummy chocolate and coconut cookie things?"

~later, at the store~

"Why am I even here?" Sasuke sulked as far away from the group as he could manage, which wasn't far with Rythia tugging him ever closer to them since she didn't want to get separated.

"Will you bake cookies with me? Please? Pretty please with an applesauce on top?" Rythia begged.

Sasuke looked at her and couldn't say no. "Damn it."

"Ooh, are there the cookies with the pretty and colourful chocolate chips?" she asked, jumping up and down.

"No!" said Konjou. "Ever since we got here you've been super hyper. The last thing you need is more sugar! No cookies for you! All we are getting today are the ingredients for cookies"

"But I can get some chocolate, right?" Shinzui asked Kankuro, since he was paying.

"Of course! How dangerous could it be? It'd probably be the cutest thing ever! Eeee!" he squealed, putting a whole box of dark chocolate in the cart. Shinzui giggled evilly while Kankuro paid for the groceries.

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**Author's note: I have written another chapter! Hooray! Sorry for the long wait guys! As always, reviews make me happy! If you have an idea of what trouble they should get into next, message me or review. Even if you don't have an account you can do an anonymous review. That's how awesome life is. Love you guys!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Woo hoo! Another chapter! Merry Christmas, guys! And I am really, really bad at getting things written. This chapter took much help and motivation from Cameo to get done. But do not fear, this story will NEVER END! There will be also be a chapter soon about how the characters are doing in this world. I foresee some art teachers very angry at Deidara...**

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"I hate cookies," grouched Sasuke. "You may have used your irresistible powers of persuasion to make me get in the kitchen but nothing will convince me to actually _touch_ those things. I don't make cookies." Something of Rythia's own personality slipped to the surface and she pinned him to the wall, getting a kunai out of her pocket.

"You. Will. Make. Me. Some. Cookies." she growled dangerously. Was that fear she saw in his eyes? It was. Suddenly he had a flashback.

-Flashback-

Itachi stood over Sasuke, wearing a pink frilly apron. It was a very, very menacing pink frilly apron.

"Make me some cookies," he commanded.

"Noooo!" Sasuke yelled. Itachi reached over and forced Sasuke into a pink apron of his own decorated with little hearts and flowers.

"You are weak. Why are you weak? Because you lack the proper apron," he repeated the whole time.

-End flashback-

"Nooooo!" he screamed, thrashing around madly. "Not pink!" Rythia stared in confusion, a WTF expression on her face.

"The cookies are brown, teme. There's no pink," she said. "Wait", she thought. "I called him teme? Since when do I call people that? I always call Shinzui dobe when she's an idiot. Never have I called anyone teme. Now that I think of it, why am I making cookies? I hate making cookies. Why did I ask for the colourful rainbow chip cookies at the store? Naruto's personality must be taking over mine! No! But how come this isn't happening to Konjou or Shinzui? Oh well," "Sasuke! Go make me some cookies!" she commanded, making him cower in a corner. Cameo slapped a bowl of cookie dough in front of him.

"Here's the dough, here's the spoon, here's the flour in case it's too sticky, here's the pan, here's the fork, here's the knife, here's the plate, here's the meat tenderizer in case you want to hit something or someone and here's the kitchen sink!" she rattled off, pointing to each item. Sasuke looked absolutely befuddled.

"W-what was that first thing?" he stammered.

"Dough," she stated and walked off, leaving Sasuke staring at the dough. Meanwhile, Konjou and Shinzui were having a dough-ball-fight, throwing wads of cookie batter at each other. Konjou snatched one out of the air, popping it into her mouth.

"Ninja skills!" she exclaimed.

-Some unspecified amount of time later-

"Ding!" The timer for the last pan of cookies rang. At the same time, the doorbell rang. Konjou jumped up to answer the door while Shinzui dashed to get the cookies. The result was a spectacular collision that tripped everyone in the room.

"Deidara, I really hope you're not blowing things up again!" Kankuro called from upstairs. The doorbell rang again, then the door opened and Shikamaru walked in.

"Typical of you, to come in after the cookies are baked!" Konjou complained, walking into the living room. "I guess you can have some though. Uh, guys? I think it's the end of the world! Gaara is asleep on the couch!"

"Wow, it must be late!" Shinzui said.

"Maybe we should all go to sleep!" Konjou suggested, still freaked out that Gaara was asleep.

"Good plan" Cameo yawned.

"I think Temari has enough PJs for the girls to borrow, and Kankuro and Gaara might have something for the guys" Konjou said helpfully. Shinzui appeared confused.

"What do Rythia and I wear? Some of each?" Konjou sprinted upstairs and returned with an armful of clothing.

"Here's some guy sleep pants and a girl shirt for you, and here's the opposite for you!" she said, handing out the correct articles of clothing.

"Guh" Rythia complained at the pink pants with a purple fan print that she received. "At least the shirt is okay. It's just plain black."

"It's…so…plaid-erful and warm!" Shinzui gushed about the sleep pants she was handed. "But the shirt is a little bit too big." She held up the camisole sadly. "It's too bad, it's a nice shade of purple. Here, Rythia! Maybe it'll fit you!" Shinzui tossed it at Rythia. "That means I get the t-shirt." Rythia looked like she was about to cry.

"But it's mine!" she cried. Konjou stepped in holding a black camisole for Shinzui.

"Weeee! Fuzzy pants!" cried Cameo, lost in the joy of fleece.

"Oh god, you guys!" she said, exasperated. "Get changed and go to sleep! There are blankets in the cupboard right there." She pointed to the blankets.

- Some Undetermined Amount of Minutes later-

"Zzzzzzz"

"Gaara's snoring again! Make him shut up!" Shinzui threw a pillow in the direction of the offending noise.

* * *

**Author's note: Yeah, Rythia has a sudden realization of her stupid behavior. It's because she's been threatening to kill me if her character keeps acting in character as Naruto. (because it's just so funny!) Don't kill me please, I'm small, cute and I give you stuff. ^_^ To remind you, I love reviews. Reviews make me write. Without reviews, the story rarely gets updated. **

**Also, I'm sewing right now. If you want to request anything (you know those hats that look like animals? I make those for $15-20! I do custom costume accessories for cosplays too) go to evilchibis. webs. com without the spaces. I promise to have some pictures up, I'm just kinda lazy (as you know from the speed of my updates!). Don't worry, if you order something, it will get done fast. Money motivates me! **end of shameless self-promotion****


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